We all hear voices and see signs that confirm and/or help us to make decisions, take actions, move forward. The voices may be our parents, society, our own internal thoughts or desires. It can also be God. Sometimes God is subtle, sometimes God is pronounced.
Some will argue, very effectively, that it is certainly nothing divine, ever. I disagree.
I was preparing to speak at the Life Rocks Radical Unschooling conference recently. I was asked to discuss how I bridge the gap from corporate America to Radical Unschooling – two very different environments. The former all business. The latter all family – to put it simply.
I had put together several pages of notes on my iPad the days leading up to the talk. I had crafted my presentation to drive home the points I intended in a very specific order. An hour before the session I was reviewing my notes when I pressed an unknown sequence of copy/paste/select all. I erased all my detailed talking points. Only one sentence was left.
My stomach flipped. I stood up, woozy. What the hell was I going to do?
Public speaking is a fear for some. It’s not for me. My fear is looking like an idiot. To avoid this, I prepare well. There’s nothing wrong with this, right? Practice makes perfect. We all want to be clear and make sure we get our points across. But I have a larger problem, control.
Despite my “faith” in God, I was controlling every single aspect of the talk. There was no room for God to enter. I probably should have realized this when the stress and anxiety became overwhelming when I was putting my presentation together. Something was wrong. There was no need for all that negative energy. I was relying solely on me.
God does not want this. He wants to use me to get his points across. A poorly presented point from God will blow away any presentation from Ted.
To wrap this up, my talk was focused on how “my way” (Top-down, corporate thinking) is wrong. That is, my traditional Might Is Right way of thinking in regards to raising my kids smashes head on with the family-centered principles of unschooling, as well as many other aspects of happy living.
The remaining sentence that was left on my iPad, after deleting more than 1500 words was, “My Way Is Wrong.”
God spoke very clearly to me through my iPad. He was saying listen, you idiot, you keep trying to do things all by yourself. You’re getting stressed out, and driving you, and everyone else around you, crazy. Trust me. Let’s do this together. It’ll be so much better.
Despite this clear message from God, I shook my iPad to “undo” the paste mistake. The new message from God: There is nothing to undo.
Thanks for reading,
~ Ted Olson