What’s on your heart is one of those questions we ask when someone’s wrestling with something. It’s a great question because it forces us to speak, out loud, what the voices in our heads are telling us. These voices (or intuitions) provide valuable information on everything from how to approach a hurting friend, to a weighty business decision, to figuring out what we want to be when we grow up. However, our inner voices can hurt us just as much as they help.
Think of how we view ourselves. Not like when someone is asking us in a job interview, or when we’re feeling great – as we won’t get at our roots. Rather, what do we think when things aren’t going well, when we’re vulnerable, when we’re hurting. Do we think like Stuart Smalley – that we’re not good enough, not smart enough? Do we look at others and think they have it altogether, what’s wrong with me? Or maybe “I’m such an idiot!” rolls off our tongue too often, and too naturally?
If we’re thinking these things, the question we can ask ourselves is what’s in our hearts. Few care to admit it, or even consider it as part of the problem, but we have a heart problem. It comes in a lot of forms, but envy, pride, resentment, superiority, greed are just a few. They’re cancers that cling to our hearts like embedded ticks. They imprison us.
We think we’re free and that our minds are our own. They’re not. We’re hosts to a bunch of toxins that we think we control. We’re kind of like the alcoholic who says he’ll be fine just after receiving his second DUI. This isn’t meant to be dramatic. This is what all the spiritual gurus through the ages have been telling us – get rid of this crap that enslaves us and be free and powerful.
The negative voices are great opportunities to recognize the poison. We can’t begin to address that which we don’t understand or can’t see. With this stuff on our heart, our intuitions are cloudy. We can’t truly hear our inner voices – God, especially.
However, our inner voices are busy – always working so we get lots of opportunities to listen. The voice is often subtle, small, and can seem quite ordinary, but try following it once or twice and see if anything blooms.
Thanks for reading,
~ Ted Olson